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Law of Fives

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The law of fives band

The Law of Fives is never wrong (logo for The Law of Fives band)

The Law of Fives is one of the oldest Erisian Mysterees. It was first revealed to Good Lord Omar and is one of the great contributions to come from The Hidden Temple of The Happy Jesus.

POEE subscribes to the Law of Fives of Omar's sect. And POEE also recognizes the holy 23 (2+3=5) that is incorporated by Episkopos Dr. Mordecai Malignatus, KNS, into his Discordian sect, The Ancient Illuminated Seers of Bavaria.


The Law of Fives is never wrong.


The Law of Fives as quoted uses the word "Five" five times.

Like most of Discordianism, the Law of Fives appears on the surface to be either some sort of weird joke, or bizarre supernaturalism; but under this, it may help clarify the Discordian view of how the human mind works.

In the Erisian Archives is an old memo from Omar to Mal-2: "I find the Law of Fives to be more and more manifest the harder I look."

Appendix Beth of Robert Shea's and Robert Anton Wilson's The Illuminatus! Trilogy considers some of the numerology of Discordianism, and the question of what would happen to the Law of Fives if everyone had six fingers on each hand. The authors assert that the real Law of Fives is realizing that everything can be related to the number five if you try hard enough. Sometimes the steps required may be highly convoluted.

Another way of looking at the Law of Fives is as a symbol for the observation of reality changing that which is being observed in the observer's mind. Just as how when one looks for fives in reality, one finds them, so will one find conspiracies, ways to determine when the apocalypse will come, and so on and so forth when one decides to look for them. It cannot be wrong, because it proves itself reflexively when looked at through this lens.


There are a number of proofs of the Law of Fives. That number is five, or is related to five. Discordian scholars are always appending more.

  • 2 + 3 = 5
  • Descartes, famed philosopher who thought that he could prove the existence of God, was invited go and tutor the 23 year old Queen of Scandinavia. The rigors of the cold climate and the fact that she demanded that the lessons began at 5 am eventually caused him to succumb to pneumonia and die. Recently, evidence has come to light that Decartes might not have been killed by natural causes. Some suspect that he was killed by arsenic poisoning.
  • The fifth letter of the alphabet is 'e'. Eris begins with an 'e'.
  • The twenty-third letter of the alphabet is 'w'. 'W' is made up of four lines and has five points. 'W' is also noted for its participation in the five main journalistic questions: Who? What? Where? Why? When?
    • W is the fourth letter from the end of the alphabet, but since it's a double, it counts as five.
  • Humans are generally born with five fingers on each hand, five toes on each foot and five extensions to each trunk (head, arm, arm, leg, leg).
  • Fnord.
  • Most people are right handed. There are five letters in the word 'right'
  • In Star Wars, Luke is identified as "Red Five" when he flies the X-Wing.
    • The X in X-Wing has four points plus one intersection.
    • There are five letters in "X-wing."
    • X is the Roman numeral for 10 and 10 is 5+5
  • Email -E and five letters.
  • Eris returned in 1166 BCE (Gregorian): one from six is five. Also, 1+1+6+6=14 and 1+4=5.
  • Kallisti has five letters, if you don't count the doubles or the one with the dot.
  • Dr. Pepper is advertised as having 23 flavors, two plus three is five.
  • Eris, Satan, and Jesus all have the letter 's' in their names. The letter 's' looks kinda like a 5.
    • also Satan and Jesus both are five letters
  • In roman numerals 5 is 'V'. 'W', the 23rd letter in the alphabet is made of two roman 5s.
  • The element V, Vanadium, on the periodic table of elements is the 23rd element. It is also part of the fifth group.
  • The 23rd digit of pi is 6, which is 2 x 3, which is practically 2 + 3.
    • Also, if counting the initial "3", the 5th digit of pi is 5.
  • The phrase "The Law of Fives" contains a direct reference to the word "Five"
  • The 5 food groups (which are also often shaped like a pyramid!)
    • The letters of the word "pyramid" add up to 77, 7+7=14 and 1+4=5
      • There are ten words in the previous sentence (excluding numbers), 10 = 5+5
        • That one too! *mind asplode*
          • Also five in that one!
  • Acid was originally code-named "LSD-25" (5*5)
  • The axial tilt of the Earth is 23,5 degrees (rounded to the nearest .5 naturally) 2 + 3 = 5 and 0,5 extra just to make it extra clear.
  • There are 5 Platonic solids in 3D space

E is the 5th letter of the alphabet
R is the 18th letter 18 x 10 = 180 a multiple of 5
I is 9th 9 x 10 = 90 a multiple of 5
S looks like a 5 and is 19th 19 x 10 = 190 another multiple of 5 The law of 5 is never wrong. Order is a lie, there is only rhythm in the chaos. Our Lady Discord loves to dance.

The letter SEdit

Knotted torus, 6 2

2-dimensional picture of a 3-dimensional torus, showing clear characteristics of both S and 5. That adds up to a total of 5 dimensions, you know.

The letter S, widely known as the letter most resembling the (holy?) number 5, is also conveniently the 5th letter of the alphabet, at least if you start counting from O onwards, which kinda looks like the number 0.

It has been written:

Sometimes, maybe when the stars are right, 0 could be 1, especially if it helps you get closer to the rule of the golden 5.

Thusly, if O=0=1, P=2, Q=3, R=4, S=5 quod erratum demonstrandum.

It has also been written:

Even the alphabet can't escape from the golden rule of 5's.

The letter fiveEdit

No it isn't. Or iƽ it? Ƽure, why not?

The symbol fiveEdit

This neither.

Apple of Discord This page uses content from Principia Discordia, and may share a type of similarity with the original. The type of similarity that they may share might be called "identical." Or not. All rights reversed.

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